The Power of the Pause

Are you a motivated individual?  Are you always moving forward?  Are you always working on the next goal?  Do you get pleasure from the hustle of creating your future?  If you’re nodding yes right now, I’m glad for you.  Those are generally good qualities to possess.  You’re well on your way to achieving your dreams.  However, let me ask you another set of questions.  Which day of the week do you generally take off to rest?  How often do you find quiet places to reflect?  What do your personal retreats look like?  How much do you value rest and reflection?  If you’re staring blankly at these words wondering why anyone would ask such silly questions, we need to talk.  You, my friend, need to understand the power of the pause.

But, why?  Why would you need to stop, rest and reflect?  You don’t get any work done that way.  You’re either taking ground or losing ground, right?  Wrong.  If you’re under the impression that you can just push, push, push and continue to take ground, you’ve bought into a lie.  Have you heard the Law of Diminishing Returns?  The Law of Diminishing Returns simply states that every individual will hit a point in time when productivity will drop off significantly and will not return, no matter how many hours worked and how hard that individual tries to push through the wall they feel they’ve hit.  Daily, you’ll usually hit this wall at the 8-10-hour point.  On a weekly basis, after 5-6 days.  Beyond that, you’ll need to experiment and figure you’re monthly and yearly rhythms.  Think of your life like a road trip.  Driving hard may get you to your destination, but every road-trip is filled with pauses to cool down and refuel.

If you’re a hard driver and have thought of rest and reflection as wasted time, let me share two truths that those of us who do take pauses have learned.

Truth #1: Magic happens when you create space to dream and reflect.  A great mentor of mine told me years ago, “Life happens in the margins.”  He was right.  What are the margins?  They are the buffer times in your schedule and your life.  If you have every minute scheduled, all the time, you have no margin and that’s no kind of life.  When you create these margins in your life, you’re creating space to dream and reflect.  Imagine how much more you could accomplish if you had a regular flood of new and creative thoughts come to you.  This is why you get some of your greatest ideas in the shower.  It’s because the shower may be the only place you ever stop working!  That’s the magic that happens when you create space to dream and reflect.  Have you ever taken a walk down streets you normally drive?  If you do, you’ll notice all kinds of things you’ve never seen before.  That mom and pop business that doesn’t have a flashy sign.  The beautiful fountain that’s slightly obscured by a strip mall.  A lone home in the middle of a retail district.  You gain a greater perspective when you slow down.  You see things that were previously hidden from sight.  Your best ideas will be hidden from you if you continue to drive hard all the time.  Slow down and create space in your life to dream and reflect.

Truth #2.  Energy naturally returns and increases through these times of rest and reflection.  Are you tired?  If you never pause, rest and reflect, the answer is certainly yes.  If you’re in the camp with so many others who desperately want more energy, let me tell you something.  A good night's sleep or a few hours unplugged from your work will give you 10x more energy than that 4-pack of Red Bull you use as a crutch.  You can’t argue with God’s design.  You’re an amazingly complex machine, but you were born with the design that requires rest.  Just like any other machine with a design, if you use it like it was intended to be used, it performs. If you use it in a way contrary to its design, it breaks down.  I can’t tell you how many times I’ve done nothing for nearly an entire day, feeling like I had no energy, only to magically feel my physical and mental energy hit 100% sometime in the late afternoon.  The only thing I did to replenish that energy was nothing.  We are made to rest and reflect.  If we don’t we are not using our bodies and minds as they were designed by our Creator.  No wonder we’re tired, sluggish and stuck. 

It’s counter-intuitive, but if you want max energy and max creativity, you must step back, rest and reflect.  It’s the power of the pause.  It’s real and you cannot ignore it.

Agree or disagree?  I'd like to know.  And I'd like to know why.  Please, leave a comment.

Punch Your Fears In The Face (excerpt from my upcoming new book)

Have you ever been afraid?  Have you ever doubted yourself?  I'm in the final stages of a book manuscript that covers a time in my life where I was very afraid and I doubted myself very much.  I sure didn't do everything right, but I did a few things right.  Below is an excerpt from my book manuscript.  This is one thing I did right.  I was bold and punched my fear in the face.  I hope this is inspiring to you today.

From my upcoming, yet untitled, book:

Making a difference in the world is fairly broad job description.  That was going to take some focus.  Like I’ve said before, one of the best ways to decide who you are is to decide who you are not.  It’s process of elimination and it takes effort, risk and some time.  As Summer turned to Fall in 2012, I was mowing less grass and picking up more leaves.  It’s the nature of the landscaping business.  As I spent those countless hours with a leaf blower strapped to my back and earplugs in my ears, it was just God and me for most of the day.  I knew I wasn’t to quit on life.  I knew God had a purpose for me to make a difference as a coaching leader.  But how would God accomplish that work through me?  I was still very unclear on that.   There were a couple fundamental questions I needed to answer.  The first was, which arena would I be making this difference in?  The previous 18 years of my life had all centered around church ministry.  My only real career had been church ministry.  But, just months out of the biggest ministry disaster and personal pain I had ever endured, did I want to dive back into ministry?  This was a real question I had to explore.  I prayed about that often.  I talked with Sara about it often.  I confided in her that sometimes I wondered if church leaders were second-rate leaders who couldn’t really make it in the business world.  Maybe those guys were the real rock stars.  I just didn’t know, but I was curious enough to venture into the business world, just a little. 

I saw a listing for openings for Farmers Insurance.  Of course, there are always openings like these.  It’s the business model for some insurance companies.  They interview as many people as they can, tell them all they can have their own business, train them and set them up as agents, all the while, knowing that 90% plus will fail.  But, the 10% who stick will make the company and themselves some good money.  I guess it’s a good business plan, except for the 90% who feel like failures on the back end.  I guess that’s a different story for a different time.

So, with the understanding of what I was interviewing for, I took an opportunity to be bold.  I showed up for my interview at a small mid-town office with a District manager named Kirk.  He was a good guy and I could tell he had been, himself, a successful agent.  He started with the normal spiel about how successful I could be and how I was “just the kind of person they were looking for.”  When he asked me for my thoughts I told him I was not at all the kind of person they were looking for, but I was the kind of person they needed.  He was a bit taken aback but seemed intrigued enough to not ask me to immediately leave.  He asked me to elaborate.  I proceeded to tell him that I hated sales.  I would never be good at it because I didn’t want to be good at it.  If the only job openings they had was for more people to sell more insurance, our conversation was over.  He was still listening so I went on to tell him that what I could bring to his team was almost 20 years of leadership experience and an understanding and passion for a coaching style of leadership.  “Imagine how much more insurance your agents could sell if they had a coach who could help them be their best.”, I said.  He put his hand up, much like Simon Cowell does when he's heard enough of an awful American Idol audition.  I stopped my pitch.  “It’s very interesting that you would show up here today with this coaching thing in mind.  It just so happens that Farmers has a program just like that set to launch in a couple test markets very soon.” 

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As it turned out, Farmers Insurance also suspected their agents could perform better if they were being coached.  Kirk told me that he would really like to hire me, but his district, unfortunately, was not one of the test markets, but he had a friend who was over the East Tulsa district and that was one of the test markets.  He made a call to his friend, Cory, about this strange guy who showed up for a sales interview squawking about coaching. I left there without a job offer, but I did have another interview scheduled and this time it was for a job I could actually see myself doing.  But much more importantly, I left that day with a new confidence in myself.  I was more than just a church leader.   I held my own with these business guys just fine.  It was a liberating and invigorating feeling. 

Here's what you need to notice.  Don't miss this or you miss it all.  That liberation and invigoration came only after I faced my fear and walked it down.  I pray that this will inspire you to walk your fears down.  Imagine who you can become on the other side of fear . . .

Brand New LifePlan Experience dates for Men, Women & Couples! (April 2018)

You've heard it before.  No one plans to fail.  We only fail to plan.  The reason you've heard it before is that it's true. In the last year, over a dozen people have gone through this experience with outstanding results and we are excited to offer this experience again!  For more information on what this experience can do for you, check out the story of one of our past participants below:

"The Life Plan retreat changed the course of my life and gave me renewed hope and a strategic plan for my life. By reviewing my life's story and identifying my purpose, passions, and values, I was able to discern how God had shaped my life and prepared me to fulfill His plan in pursuit of my Kingdom purpose." 
~ Craig Cross - Oil and Natural Gas Consultant

We're very excited to be able to bring this experience to you again this year.  Mark your calendar and save your spot.  We're sure this one will fill up quickly.  It's for men, women or couples, it's super-affordable and it will be life-changing for anyone who engages the process.

This is for you if you are dealing with . . .

• A major life transition
• A move from success to significance
• Yearning to know what God has prepared you for next
• Burn-out and losing passion for life
• A desire to find a healthy life/work balance
• Increased fulfillment and meaning in life
• Alignment with who you are and what you do
• True success, as God defines it, in your most important life, family and work priorities

What are the details?
When: April 13-14 (This is not an overnight retreat.  See schedule below)
Where: Solace Church, Tulsa, OK
Cost: Earlybird Discount before February 23 is $349 per person.  After February 23, $399. (Covers meals, materials, the experience and a follow-up coaching session)
(*Done individually, this experience is priced at $1650*)
Deadline: The final deadline to register is Friday, March 30.  (50% deposit holds your spot)
*It's very likely it will fill up prior to this date, so move quickly.
Other: Maximum group of 12  (first come, first served)

Schedule: (breaks are built into the days)
*Friday (4/13) - 8:30am - 9pm
*Saturday (4/14) - 8:30am - 4pm

Below are two very helpful links that give you an overview and some more details:
One-page LPE overview
Three-page LPE detail 

How can I reserve my spot?

Just click here to hold your spot with a 50% deposit. You'll be billed separately for the remaining balance prior to the experience.

Click here to pay in full.